· ·

Navigation

Sailboat navigating rough seas toward a lighthouse, symbolizing direction, adjustment, and staying on course.

Most of us understand the importance of having goals. We want to know where we are going, what we want to achieve, and perhaps even what kind of person we want to become along the way. But knowing your destination is not the same as knowing how to get there. You also need to know how to navigate.

Setting a Course Is Only the Beginning

Imagine a ship leaving one port and heading toward another. The destination is clear. The course has been calculated. Everyone knows where the ship is supposed to go. But that does not mean the ship can simply point toward the destination and continue without adjustment.

There is wind. There are currents. Weather changes. Other vessels may appear. Conditions change along the way. The ship constantly needs small course corrections. Life is not very different.

We can set a goal and have a clear idea of what we want. But once we start moving, things happen. We learn new things. Circumstances change. We make mistakes. Opportunities appear that we did not expect.

There is a saying I have always liked: Put your goals in concrete and your plans in sand.

Your destination can remain firm while the route toward it stays flexible. Changing the plan does not necessarily mean changing the goal. Sometimes adapting the route is exactly what allows you to reach it. That is what navigation is about.

You Can Be Moving and Still Be Off Course

There is an important difference between movement and progress. You can work hard every day. You can be disciplined. You can keep pushing forward.

But if your course is slightly wrong, the distance between where you intended to go and where you actually end up can become surprisingly large over time. That does not mean constantly changing your goals.

It means occasionally stopping and asking: Am I still heading in the right direction?

Sometimes the answer will be yes. Sometimes you only need a small correction. And sometimes you may realize that the route needs to change completely.

When You Cannot See the Way Ahead

I learned something about navigation very literally many years ago when I worked at sea. I had worked my way up on deck, and part of my job eventually involved steering the ship.

The first times I stood behind the wheel, we practiced out at sea. A large ship does not react like a car. When you begin a turn, you also have to understand when to counter the movement so the vessel settles on the correct course. An officer stood beside me and told me exactly what to do.

Later came something much more challenging: steering while entering a harbor. Now there were passengers on board, people eating and drinking, and everything had to be done smoothly. A badly handled turn could affect far more than their comfort. In some places there was shallow water outside the safe channel, so staying on course really mattered.

One experience has stayed with me in particular. We were approaching a harbor in very dense fog. I could barely see anything ahead of me.

We knew exactly which harbor we were going to. We knew where the entrance was. We knew the course. But from where I was standing, I could not see the way.

So I had to rely on the instruments in front of me and on the officer giving me instructions. A few degrees one way. A correction. Then another instruction. I concentrated on the course and followed what I was being told.

And then, through the fog, the lights at the harbor entrance appeared on either side of the ship. We were exactly where we needed to be.

That experience has become a powerful picture for me of how navigation works in life. Sometimes you know where you are going even when you cannot see the way there.

The Value of Another Perspective

This is also where another person can become incredibly valuable. You can certainly choose to navigate toward your goals and dreams completely on your own. But that often makes the journey harder and more uncertain than it needs to be.

A mentor can give you something that is difficult to give yourself: perspective.

Preferably, that mentor is someone who has already done what you are trying to do or has travelled a similar road. They know some of the currents. They recognize some of the obstacles. They may see that you are drifting long before you notice it yourself.

A good mentor does not take control of your life. They do not do the work for you. You still have to steer. But they can help you recognize when a course correction is needed.

Just as the officer on the bridge could see and understand things that I could not yet see for myself, someone with greater experience can sometimes give us a perspective we simply do not have yet.

Navigation Requires Confidence and Humility

I believe we should trust ourselves. We should believe that we are capable of learning, growing, and accomplishing things that may initially seem difficult.

But believing in yourself does not mean believing that you must know everything yourself. There is strength in being able to say: This is where I want to go. I am willing to do the work. But I am also willing to learn from someone who has travelled this way before me.

The goal is not to prove that you can travel alone. The goal is to reach the destination.

Keep Your Hands on the Wheel

Whatever you are working toward right now, perhaps the most important question is not simply: Where do I want to go?

Also ask: How am I navigating? What are you using as your instruments? How often are you checking your course? Who can give you a perspective that you cannot see from where you are standing? And when you discover that you have moved slightly off course, are you willing to make the correction?

You may not always be able to see the entire journey ahead. Sometimes there will be fog.

But if you know your destination, stay adaptable in how you get there, pay attention to your instruments, listen to experienced guidance, and make the necessary course corrections, you can keep moving in the right direction.

And eventually, the lights you have been navigating toward may begin to appear through the fog.

Related reading: Reaching your destination also requires being honest about whether your actions are taking you there. Read: It Starts With You.

Was this article helpful?
YesNo

Similar Posts

  • |

    Be the Bridge

    Sometimes something feels easy when we do it as part of a job, but much harder when we do it for ourselves. At work, we may have no problem calling someone, sending an email, starting a conversation, or presenting an idea. We are representing a company or completing a task. But when we begin building something of our own, the same actions can suddenly feel personal.

    The phone feels heavier. We hesitate before sending the message. We begin wondering what the other person will think, how they will respond, and what their answer might say about us. A simple no can begin to feel like personal rejection. But perhaps there is another way to see it.

    Imagine a Backpack

    Imagine placing everything you have to offer inside a backpack. It could be a product, a service, an opportunity, an idea, knowledge, experience, or something else that can create genuine value for another person. You put the backpack on and carry it with you.

    When you contact someone, you are not asking them to approve of you. You are simply giving them the opportunity to look at what you carry. You are the messenger. You are also the bridge between the person and what is inside your backpack.

    Your responsibility is to build that bridge and make the offer honestly. Their responsibility is to choose.

    A No Is Not Always About You

    Think about how people choose grocery stores. Some people regularly shop at one store and would never choose another. Someone else may make the opposite choice. That does not mean either store has no value. People make different choices based on their preferences, needs, experiences, priorities, and current circumstances.

    It will be the same with what you carry. Some people will say yes. Some people will say no. Some people may say not now.

    Some will, some won’t—so what?

    Their answer does not automatically define the value of what you offer. More importantly, it does not define your value as a person.

    There is a saying I have learned through the business I do:

    “We are looking for the people who are looking for us.”

    That does not mean sitting still and waiting for those people to appear. We still need to reach out. We still need to start conversations and build bridges. But we do not need everyone to choose what we carry.

    Know the Value of What You Carry

    This way of thinking also comes with responsibility. Your backpack should contain something you genuinely believe can create real value for the people you approach.

    If you know that what you offer cannot help them, then confidence is not what you are building. You are simply creating false expectations.

    Before becoming proud of what you carry, make sure it is worthy of that pride. Understand what you offer, why it matters, and how it may help someone.

    When you are secure in that knowledge, reaching out can begin to feel different. You are not trying to mislead anyone or force them into a decision. You are offering them the opportunity to look at something you honestly believe may have value. They are still free to choose.

    Putting on the Backpack

    The backpack is not only an image. It can become a mental tool. Before making a call, sending a message, or starting a conversation, pause for a moment. Imagine putting on the backpack. Remind yourself that you are carrying something you believe in. Then remind yourself of your role:

    You are not responsible for making the other person say yes. You are not responsible for their timing, priorities, previous experiences, or personal preferences. You are responsible for taking the step, building the bridge, and giving them the opportunity to look.

    This can help create some distance between your identity and their answer. A no may still feel disappointing. But it does not need to become a judgment about who you are.

    Self-Leadership Through Action

    Some people find it easy to approach others without overthinking. For others, it requires courage. Neither person should be judged. We all carry different experiences, fears, strengths, and beliefs about ourselves.

    Self-leadership is not always about feeling confident before we act. Sometimes it means learning to guide ourselves through uncertainty and act even when confidence is not yet there.

    The more often you take the step, the more natural it can become. You begin learning that you can handle a no. You begin separating other people’s choices from your own value. You begin building confidence through action.

    The next time you feel uncertain about contacting someone, picture the backpack. Remember what you carry. Remember why you believe it has value. Put the backpack on, build the bridge, and take the next step.

    Your responsibility is to offer. Their responsibility is to choose.


    Related reading: Our fear of rejection is often connected to our need to feel accepted and understood. Read The Need for Acceptance.

    Do your emotions sometimes influence whether you take action or hold yourself back? Explore the Emotional Style Test.

    Want to understand how you lead yourself when something feels uncomfortable or uncertain? Explore the Leadership Style Test.

    Was this article helpful?
    YesNo
  • The Courage to Be Visible

    Building a website is one thing.

    Putting your thoughts online is another.

    But showing yourself — your face, your voice, your personality — on video is a completely different level of exposure.

    When you see yourself on camera, it’s very easy to become your own harshest critic.

    You notice everything.

    How you speak.
    How you look.
    How you move.
    Whether you sound confident enough.

    I’ve experienced that myself while recording videos for Equipido.

    You watch the video back and think:
    “Could I have said that better?”
    “Do I really look like that?”
    “Should I record it again?”

    But at some point, you have to accept something very simple.

    This is who I am.

    This is how I speak.

    This is how I look.

    And the biggest judge in the room is often not other people.

    It’s ourselves.

    Once you accept that everything doesn’t need to be perfect, something changes. You stop trying to control every small detail and start focusing on the message instead.

    Some people will appreciate it.

    Some people won’t.

    That’s part of being visible.

    But if you wait until everything feels perfect before you share something with the world, you will probably never share anything at all.

    Related reading: Fear and doubt often appear when we choose to be visible and share who we are. Read: Fear and Doubt Are Part of Growth.

    Want to understand how your emotional patterns shape the way you handle vulnerability, fear of judgment, and being seen? Learn more about the Emotional Style Test.

    Was this article helpful?
    YesNo
  • |

    Are You Reading Books—or Just Owning Them?

    A book can be many things.

    It can be something beautiful to keep on a shelf. It can be something you collect, organize, and feel proud to own. Maybe you have 200 books, 300 books, or even more, standing neatly in your library with barely a mark on them.

    And there is nothing wrong with that. Some books are special. Some are signed. Some have personal meaning. Some are worth keeping clean and untouched.

    But when we talk about books on personal development, leadership, communication, habits, or growth, I think we need to ask a different question.

    Why did we buy the book in the first place?

    Was it to make the bookshelf look better, or was it because we wanted to learn something, change something, understand something, or become better in some area of life?

    In my opinion, a book is not just something to own. A book is a tool.

    Someone may have spent years, sometimes decades, building the knowledge, experience, stories, lessons, failures, and insights that ended up inside those pages. In some cases, a book may represent a large part of a person’s life work, compressed into 200 or 300 pages.

    When you open that book, you are not just reading words. You are getting access to someone’s experience. You are getting access to ideas that may have taken them years to understand. And you can receive those ideas in a matter of hours.

    That is powerful, but only if we use the book.

    I know many people are careful with their books. They do not want to write in them. They do not want to fold a page. They do not want to underline anything. Maybe they were taught growing up to be careful with books, and of course, there is value in taking care of things.

    But if the book is a tool for your growth, then I believe you should not be afraid to use it.

    Write in it. Underline important sentences. Fold a page if you need to. Put notes in the margin. Mark the parts that challenge you, inspire you, or make you stop and think.

    Be a little wild with it.

    Because the purpose of the book is not only to stay in perfect condition. The purpose of the book is to help you grow.

    Of course, there are exceptions. I have books that I do not write in. I have signed books from authors that are special to me, and I leave those untouched. But when I want to really study a book, I often have another copy that I use as a working tool.

    That is the difference for me. Some books are keepsakes. Other books are tools. And when a book is a tool, I want to use it fully.

    Today, I often use several versions of the same book. I may have the physical book. I may have the Kindle version. And sometimes I also listen to the audiobook.

    For example, Atomic Habits contains so many useful ideas that reading it once is not enough for me. I can read the book in 10 or 12 hours, but that does not mean I have absorbed everything James Clear has put into it.

    There is a big difference between finishing a book and truly learning from it.

    That is why I like using highlights, notes, and repetition. With Kindle, I can mark important sections, export my highlights, and then sit down later to study them more carefully. With an audiobook, I can listen while walking, driving, or preparing breakfast. With a physical book, I can mark the pages and write my own thoughts directly beside the author’s ideas.

    Each format gives me a different way to connect with the material. And that leads to another important point: a book is not only a reading tool. It can also be a reflection tool.

    When I read a good personal development or leadership book, I do not just want to ask, “What did the author say?” I also want to ask: How does this apply to my life? Where am I already doing this? Where am I not doing this? What should I change? What is one thing I can start applying today?

    That is where the real value begins.

    Because reading a book does not automatically change your life. Studying it might. Applying it might. Returning to it might. Teaching it to someone else might.

    Another powerful way to use a book is to study it together with other people.

    This can be done in a mastermind group, a study group, a team, or even with just one friend. Some time ago, a friend and I did exactly that. We chose a book, read one chapter each week, and then met for a one-hour video call to discuss it.

    The purpose was not just to talk about the chapter. The purpose was to ask what the ideas meant, how they applied to our lives, and how we could use them practically in everyday life and in business.

    That kind of discussion can make a book much more valuable. You hear another person’s perspective. You explain your own thoughts. You are forced to think more deeply about what you have read. And sometimes, that is when the book really starts to become useful.

    If you are building an organization, leading people, developing yourself, or helping someone else grow, books can become practical tools. A book like The Magic of Thinking Big, a John Maxwell book, or another leadership book can be something you read for yourself, but it can also be something you recommend or lend to someone who is just beginning their own journey.

    But if you are going to recommend a book, it helps to have studied it yourself. Not just read it once. Studied it.

    Because then you know why it matters. You know what parts are useful. You know what questions it raises. You know how it can help someone think differently.

    That is why I think the question “What is a book?” is more important than it first sounds.

    For some people, a book is decoration. For some people, it is entertainment. For some people, it is a collector’s item. For some people, it is a tool.

    None of those answers are automatically wrong. But I think we need to be honest with ourselves.

    When it comes to books about growth, leadership, habits, communication, or success, why are we buying them? Are we mainly buying them to own them, or are we buying them to use them?

    Because if the goal is growth, then the book needs to become more than something that sits on a shelf. It needs to become part of the process.

    Maybe that means writing in it. Maybe it means highlighting. Maybe it means listening to it more than once. Maybe it means exporting your notes and studying them. Maybe it means discussing it with someone else. Maybe it means taking one idea and applying it for the next week.

    The point is not that everyone has to use books the same way.

    The point is to consider whether every book needs to be treated as something fragile, especially when the real value is not in keeping the pages perfect.

    The real value is in what the book helps you understand, change, and apply.

    So maybe the next time you pick up a book, especially a book about personal growth or leadership, ask yourself: What is this book for?

    Is it something I want to keep perfect?

    Or is it something I want to use?

    For me, many of my books are tools.

    And a tool is meant to be used.

    Want to understand what helps you turn insight into action and follow through on the growth you want? Learn more about the Goal Style Test.

    Was this article helpful?
    YesNo
  • |

    Your Best Investment

    We often talk about investments. Investing in stocks. Investing in funds. Investing in property. Investing in a business. Investing in something that may grow over time and hopefully create a better future.

    All of that can be valuable. But I believe there is one investment that comes before many others.

    The investment we make in ourselves.

    Because no matter what we want to build, improve, change, or create, we bring ourselves into it. Our thinking. Our habits. Our knowledge. Our attitude. Our discipline. Our communication. Our ability to handle setbacks. Our ability to learn.

    If those things do not grow, it becomes much harder for anything else to grow.

    A person can invest money without understanding what they are doing. A person can start a business without developing the skills needed to run it. A person can begin a health journey without learning how to build habits that last. A person can set goals without understanding what kind of person they need to become in order to reach them.

    That is why personal development matters.

    For me, investing in myself has been one of the most valuable things I have done. I do not say that because I am finished, or because I have everything figured out. I am not where I want to be in every area of life.

    But I can see clearly that the books I have read, the seminars I have attended, the education I have received, and the personal development I have worked with have shaped how I think, how I act, and how I look at the future.

    It has not made me into someone else. Maybe that is the wrong way to look at growth.

    I do not think personal development turns us into a completely different person. I think it helps bring out more of what is already inside us.

    It is a little like a block of stone. At first, it may look rough, unclear, and unfinished. But as the work continues, something begins to appear. The shape becomes clearer. The unnecessary parts are removed. The sculpture was not created from nothing. It was revealed through the process.

    I think growth can work in a similar way.

    The more we learn, the more we discover about ourselves. The more we develop, the more we notice both our strengths and the areas where we still need to grow. And the more we understand, the more we also realize how much we still do not know.

    That is not a weakness. That is part of the process.

    Investing in ourselves does not always produce an immediate result that can be measured in money. Sometimes the result shows up in our thinking. Sometimes it shows up in our attitude. Sometimes it shows up in how we handle pressure, how we communicate, how we make decisions, or how we respond when life does not go the way we planned.

    That kind of return may be difficult to calculate, but it can still be extremely valuable.

    If we invest in our health, we may gain more energy, confidence, strength, and quality of life. If we invest in our mindset, we may begin to see possibilities where we previously saw only problems. If we invest in communication, we may improve our relationships, our leadership, and our ability to work with other people.

    If we invest in financial education, we may make better decisions with money. If we invest in personal development, we may begin to understand ourselves on a deeper level and create a better direction for our future.

    That is why I believe this kind of investment is so important.

    It is not only about reading a book or attending a seminar. Those things can be powerful, but only if we use them. A book on a shelf does not change much. A course we never apply does not create much growth. A seminar may inspire us, but inspiration alone is not enough.

    The real value comes when we take what we learn and begin to live it.

    That is when information becomes transformation.

    Before choosing where to invest time, money, or energy, I think it helps to ask a few honest questions.

    What do I want to improve? What kind of person do I need to become? What knowledge am I missing? What habits are holding me back? What area of my life would change the most if I became better prepared?

    Those questions matter because self-investment is not only one thing. It can look different depending on what we need.

    For one person, investing in themselves may mean joining a health program, learning how to eat better, move more, and build routines that support a better lifestyle.

    For another person, it may mean taking a course in investing, business, leadership, communication, or personal finance.

    For someone else, it may mean reading books that challenge their thinking, finding a mentor, attending a seminar, or learning a skill that opens new possibilities.

    It may also mean building something on the side while still doing what they do today. If someone wants more options in the future, they may need to invest in the knowledge, habits, and skills required to create those options.

    In many cases, the future we want requires a version of ourselves we have not fully developed yet. That can be uncomfortable, but it can also be encouraging.

    Because it means growth is possible.

    We are not stuck only with what we know today. We can learn. We can improve. We can become more disciplined. We can become better communicators. We can become more aware. We can become stronger in the areas that matter to us.

    But it usually does not happen by accident. It happens because we choose to invest in it.

    I think one mistake many people make is that they look for better results before they look at who they are becoming. They want better finances, better health, better relationships, better confidence, better opportunities, or better leadership.

    But many of those results are connected to personal growth.

    If I want better health, I may need better habits. If I want better finances, I may need better financial understanding. If I want better relationships, I may need better communication. If I want better leadership, I may need better self-awareness. If I want better opportunities, I may need to become better prepared.

    This is why investing in yourself is not selfish. It can actually make you more valuable to others.

    When you grow, you often bring more value to your family, your work, your business, your team, and the people around you. You become better equipped to contribute, support, lead, communicate, and make decisions.

    That is a return that can affect more than just yourself.

    For me, books have played a big role in this. Not every book will change a life. Not every course will be useful. Not every seminar will create a breakthrough. But when the right idea meets the right moment, it can shift the way we see ourselves and our future.

    Sometimes one idea can change how we think. Sometimes one habit can change the direction of a year. Sometimes one decision to grow can open doors that were not visible before.

    That is why I keep coming back to this thought:

    Before investing only in what is outside of us, maybe we should also ask how much we are investing in what is inside of us.

    Our thinking. Our knowledge. Our discipline. Our health. Our communication. Our self-awareness. Our ability to grow.

    Because everything we build is affected by the person we are becoming.

    And if we want a better future, one of the most practical places to start may be with ourselves.

    Related reading: A good investment in yourself often starts with what you read and how you apply it. Read: Are You Reading Books—or Just Owning Them?

    Want to better understand yourself and discover where your greatest opportunities for growth lie? Learn more about the Core Color Personality Test.

    Was this article helpful?
    YesNo
  • |

    When You Lose Your Drive

    There was a time in my life when I couldn’t wait to get out of bed in the morning.

    I was excited about what I was building. I attended meetings, listened to several audio programs every day, read constantly, and invested countless hours in personal growth. More importantly, I loved helping other people pursue their goals and dreams. It didn’t feel like work. It felt meaningful.

    Looking back, I realize how much energy and enthusiasm I had during that period of my life. Then something changed.

    A series of experiences involving people I trusted deeply had a much greater impact on me than I realized at the time. To be clear, I take full responsibility for the decisions I made. The choices were mine. They always were. But the guidance, influence, and disappointment that followed left a mark that stayed with me for years.

    What surprised me most wasn’t what happened. It was what happened afterward.

    I lost my drive.

    The passion that had fueled me for years seemed to disappear. Activities that had once inspired me suddenly created resistance. I didn’t want to listen to educational material. I didn’t want to attend meetings. Books that once excited me stayed closed on the shelf.

    It wasn’t that I suddenly disliked personal development. It wasn’t that I hated the business environment. It wasn’t even that I had stopped believing in growth. The problem was that my mind had connected those experiences with pain.

    For years, I tried to get that drive back. I read books about motivation. I studied goal setting. I learned about habits, mindset, success principles, and how the brain works. Sometimes I would find a new approach that seemed promising. It would work for a few months, and I would feel momentum building again.

    Then it would fade. And I would find myself back at the starting line.

    If you’ve ever experienced something similar, you know how frustrating that can be. Especially when you remember who you used to be. You know what you’re capable of. You know what it feels like to be driven. You know what it feels like to wake up excited about the future. Yet somehow, you can’t seem to get back there.

    For a long time, I thought the answer was to find a bigger goal. Or a stronger purpose. Or more motivation. So I kept searching. I read more books. I listened to more advice. I tried different systems and approaches.

    But eventually I began to question something.

    What if I was asking the wrong question?

    Instead of asking, “What is my purpose?” maybe I should have been asking, “Who do I want to become?” That shift changed everything.

    Recently, while reflecting on this journey, I decided to revisit some of the books I had collected over the last twenty years. My bookshelves are filled with books on leadership, personal growth, success, motivation, communication, and psychology.

    One of the books that stood out was Atomic Habits by James Clear. I had read it before. But this time, I looked at it differently.

    What struck me wasn’t the discussion about habits. It was the focus on identity. The idea that lasting change doesn’t start with goals. It starts with the person you want to become.

    That concept resonated with me far more than another goal-setting exercise ever could.

    If someone wants financial freedom, perhaps the first question isn’t, “How do I become financially free?”

    Maybe the better question is: “What kind of person creates financial freedom?”

    How does that person think? How do they spend their time? What habits do they practice consistently? How do they respond when things don’t go according to plan?

    The same can be asked about almost any goal in life. Before focusing on the outcome, perhaps we should focus on becoming the person capable of creating that outcome.

    Will this approach work for everyone? Probably not. And that’s an important point.

    We’re all different. We have different backgrounds, different personalities, different experiences, and different challenges. The tools that help one person move forward may not help another person at all. That’s okay.

    The goal isn’t to find a solution that works for everyone. The goal is to find what works for you.

    For me, this realization has been helpful because it shifted my attention away from constantly searching for motivation and toward building a stronger foundation. Instead of chasing a feeling, I’m trying to focus on becoming the kind of person I want to be.

    The truth is that we all go through periods where we struggle. We lose confidence. We lose momentum. We question ourselves. We wonder if we’ll ever find our passion again.

    But perhaps the answer isn’t always to look further ahead. Sometimes the answer is to look deeper. To ask different questions. To challenge old assumptions. And to remember that growth isn’t always about finding the perfect path.

    Sometimes it’s simply about taking the next step and continuing to move forward.

    If you’ve been struggling to find your drive, your purpose, or your motivation, I hope this reflection gives you something to think about. Not because it contains all the answers. But because it might help you ask a different question.

    And sometimes, a different question is exactly where change begins.

    Related reading: Losing your drive can bring doubt and uncertainty, but small daily actions can also help rebuild momentum. Read: Fear and Doubt Are Part of Growth and Are Your Habits Changing Your Life?

    Want to understand what truly drives you and how to rebuild momentum when motivation fades? Learn more about the Goal Style Test.

    Was this article helpful?
    YesNo
  • |

    It Starts With You

    It is easy to say that we want something different.
    A better career. Better health. More freedom. A stronger business. Personal growth. Whatever success means to us.
    But there is another question that may be more important:
    Are we willing to become the person who can create that result?
    Because wanting something and being willing to do what it requires are not always the same thing.

    When Comfortable Starts to Feel Like Progress

    Sometimes we find something we are good at.
    We understand it. We feel comfortable doing it. Other people recognise us for it. Maybe they ask for our advice, appreciate what we do or even begin to see us as an expert.
    There is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
    But it can also become a very comfortable place to stay.
    Especially when recognition becomes part of the reward.
    When people notice us, appreciate us and make us feel important, it is easy to think:
    This must be where I should focus.
    Maybe it is.

    But there is another question worth asking:

    Is this actually taking me where I say I want to go?
    Those two things are not always the same.
    Something can make us feel successful today without necessarily moving us toward the future we say we want.

    Be Honest About What Is Holding You Back

    This is where being honest with ourselves becomes difficult.
    Sometimes the things we avoid are exactly the things we need to work on.
    Maybe we avoid situations where we might be rejected.
    Maybe we avoid conversations that make us uncomfortable.
    Maybe we stay with the things we already know because starting again would make us feel like a beginner.
    Maybe we enjoy being in an environment where we feel confident and respected, while quietly avoiding another area where we know we need to grow.
    It is much easier to continue doing something that makes us feel good than to look at the parts of ourselves that may be holding us back.
    I know this because I have done it myself.
    There are things I am comfortable doing and things that require much more from me. There are days when I would much rather stay with what I already know than push myself into something uncomfortable.

    But if the uncomfortable part is standing between me and where I want to go, avoiding it does not make it disappear.

    Does Your Goal Match Your Actions?

    There is nothing wrong with changing your goal.
    Maybe what you wanted five years ago is no longer important to you. Maybe your definition of success has changed.
    That is perfectly okay.
    Success does not have to mean money, status or building something huge. For one person it may mean freedom. For another it may mean family, health, contribution, peace of mind or simply having more control over their time.
    But whatever your goal is, I believe we owe it to ourselves to be honest about it.
    If I say I want one result while deliberately avoiding the actions required to create it, there is a gap between what I say and what I do.
    I cannot keep saying I want the destination while refusing to travel the road that leads there.
    At some point I have to make a choice.
    Either change the goal.
    Or start working on the things that are keeping me from it.

    No One Else Can Do That Work for You

    A mentor can help you.
    A leader can guide you.
    A coach can challenge you, teach you and sometimes see things in you that you cannot yet see yourself.
    But they cannot do the work for you.
    And if you are not willing to invest in your own development, why should you expect somebody else to invest more in your future than you do?
    That does not mean you have to have everything figured out.
    It does not mean you cannot be afraid.
    It does not mean you will always feel motivated.
    It simply means being willing to work on yourself — especially the parts that are easier to avoid.
    Because sometimes the biggest obstacle between where we are and where we want to be is not a lack of opportunity.
    It is something within ourselves that we have not been willing to face yet.
    And that is where real growth starts.
    It starts with you.

    Related reading: The Hidden Danger of the Comfort Zone

    Was this article helpful?
    YesNo

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *